Wowza, that last post was kind of a doozy. To say that things are different then they were then would be a lie. Unfortunately my habits and my weight are at a stand still. There's a part of me that would like to blame it on living with my in-laws. And that has definitely contributed to where I am at now, but I still ultimately have the control. We are moving out in 3 weeks, and it will be nice to have my own space to work out in, and to have my kitchen in my complete control. I can create my sheltered environment that I need in order to succeed. Eventually I need to learn how to live with food. Eventually I need to have the self control to say no, and be ok with that. But for now, and to get me started especially, I need to have zero temptations around. It is that simple!

One thing that I really wish I could improve on right now is getting myself to the gym. We have a free membership and it is a mile away and the classes there are great, but the classes that I like to attend are in the mornings. And unfortunately my kids are too unpredictable in the mornings and Cliff works late into the evenings so he isn't able to wake up with the kids if they get up without sacrificing his sleep and health. And if Calvin is in my bed and I get up, he knows! No matter what time in the morning it is and he will wake up, and anybody who is a parent knows that you do not want your toddler (who no longer naps, might I add) to wake up at 6am while you are trying to go to the gym.

I really want to work out though! I love being able to do it. I love seeing how strong my body and how capable I am. I know I am capable of a lot and that I have the total control to change my body, it's making the conscious effort to fight fight fight for it! No matter where I am, no matter what food is around me.

I'm ready to start now, but at the same time I'm pretty sure I won't be making any significant changes till we move. I'll have to think of something that I can do until then.  Peace out cyber world!